Tuesday, February 21, 2017


Omg I'm so tired in term of mentally, physically and emotionally :'( :'(

I feel like crying my lungs out but I know by doing so it doesn't make me better or help me solve anything on what I'm currently going through (but only make my eyes swollen like crap). Seriously no joke, motherhood isn't easy. Don't judge!

I thought motherhood was tough when I have my 1st child. Now motherhood is getting out of hand and killing me when I'm currently heavily pregnant in my 3rd trismeter with my 2nd child T___T 

Imagine having a 15months old toddler who is pretty active by running/climbing up&down everywhere and I'm having all the insane pregnancy pains (especially back pain which hurts like mad), the false contractions cramp and currently having nausea (which I don't know why).

And I don't have any maid but my mom do help me from time to time. However, I can't fully rely on my mother because she has her own life too. I can't be selfish to constantly ask her to help me out right? :0

But I also can't rely so much on my hubby as he is busy working and he will be all tired coming back from flights. Working life not easy same goes to stay at home mom life :/ 

Not forgetting insufficient sleep due to back pain (even though I'm having 2-3 naps a day argh so frustrating)

One word to describe it all ; MADNESS!!

Honestly, I'm truly amazed and salute those mothers who are undergoing the similar situation as I am but they are doing so well and yet I'm here failing miserably T____T 

I can only hope and pray that everything will be well and I've to put in MORE faith in myself that I can do this and I can do better! Hopping that I don't fail miserably again :/ 

At least I feel 1% better for ranting it out here. 

Being a mother is funny because it feels like you're in a love and hate relationship at times..

Although I'm feeling like shit but I'm indeed grateful and blessed for having my boy and another one on the way. 

Actually I kinda can't wait to see how my life gonna be with a newborn baby and a toddler at home. Maybe my life will be crazily upside down but fully with joy and STRESS?! Hahaha